Anson's Random Dumps #14

I have no courage.

In order to show support to a friend, I went to his school’s concert. With the current worsening pandemic situation, everyone had to scan the LeaveHomeSafe QR codes.

The person holding those QR codes was kind of short. His face was spotless. The moment I saw him, I instantly knew who he is.

His face did not change.

I scanned the QR codes and moved on up the staircase, still feeling a strange, maybe sentimental feeling.

I entered the concert hall. I was given a 60-page programme rundown booklet.

I skimmed through the contents of the book. There were names of keys, E Minor, D Minor, … names of famous composers, names of renowned people in their school, the name of my friend.

And there were even more names I recognized from the performers section. They all had the class “4-something” in front of my name.

Those people were all in the same year as me.

And then it came to me. These people were my primary school schoolmates.

I haven’t got in touch with basically all of them. And I am too timid to.

I was the only one in my primary school, in that year, to have entered the college I’m currently in. I was delighted, as that meant I didn’t have to deal with the bullies in my primary school anymore. (And in contrast, that school was quite a popular destination for my primary school schoolmates.)

But now, I feel a sense of longing.

Reunion.

Just last week, I had dinner with my primary school classmate. He was one of my best friends then. And now.

Now I remember – me and him were both short, and in 2015, we formed a friend group of four people. All were short.

That person holding those QR codes? He was one of them.

The concert ended. I walked out of the hall slowly.

There he was. Walking to I-don’t-know-who.

He looked happy.

I felt the strong urge to stop him. But I gave up. He probably wouldn’t recognize me.

I continued to walk slowly, glancing at the campus around me.

I walked down the long stairs, away from the lights of the campus, and to the darkness of the streets.

As for where the fourth member of the group is? We have no idea.

And the second member of the group is going back to the UK today.

I yearn for reunion – but for now, fate intends us to split paths.

One day.

I lack courage.

Anson